Today was the first time I didn't want to do another blog entry. I really wasn't in the mood. Don't get me wrong, I don't regret committing to the challenge of writing a post every day for two years. But today is the most tired I have felt in a long time.
I spent the past month working on a project that was commissioned by a third party. It mainly involved research and writing, two things I enjoy the most, so I was grateful for the opportunity.
But nearly every day in August saw me up to my eyeballs in research papers far more than usual, so the picture of Palpatine in the header image is a good metaphor for how I’m feeling right about now! (Before you message me, yes, I know that's Anakin on the left.)
I could (and probably should) have handed in the finished product several days ago. But like any good perfectionist, I have a habit of using every last second I’m allocated to make sure my work is up to scratch.
I spent most of today and the past few days going through the final draft with a fine-tooth comb because I always set exceptionally (some might say unrealistically) high standards for myself.
But it’s done, submitted on schedule, and I can breathe a sigh of relief for the remaining hours minutes of the day before I hit the sack.
Unfortunately, today’s efforts have drained my mental and creative efforts, so I have nothing of value to offer regarding flexibility training or biomechanics.
But I’m not going to apologise for that. I stated from the outset of this blogging challenge that I'll have nothing of substance to write some days, and this is one of those days. And it probably won't be the last!
But I'm here putting these words to metaphorical paper because I made myself (and you!) a promise that I would show up every day for 730 days in a row. Even (and especially) when I had nothing of substance to offer.
Following through on that commitment, including when I'm not providing anything particularly useful, is itself a victory in my eyes. The world is full of broken promises and failed commitments. God knows I've made my fair share of them. But it's the times when we're at our lowest, when we feel like we have nothing left to give - that is when we must follow through and not give a damn about the quality of our efforts.
As a man who endured childhood abuse, went to war, sustained life-changing injuries, battled depression and addiction, survived a suicide attempt, and is living with one of the most painful conditions known to medicine, I know more than most people that success is not determined by circumstances. It's determined by the decision to keep going regardless of the circumstances.
So, I hope this post gives you a little nudge to keep going, whoever you are, wherever you are, and whatever commitments you're struggling to follow through with.
I believe in you.